We tell kids (quite irresponsibly in my opinion) that they can be anything that they want to be when they grow up.
That deceptively poisoned message is the same overly simplistic message that so many online entrepreneurs are falling for when they believe that their idea is sure to be a big hit because they read the right book or bought the right course.
Many bad paths are taken, and many dreams are unnecessarily dashed because no one steps in with the wisdom of a reality check.
It’s time for a dose of reality from your buddy Jim…
Some sample random reality checks:
- Did you know that fewer and fewer websites actually matter online? Sure, there are more and more sites popping up every day, but GONE are the days of building little sites that you really don’t care about and trying to drive random traffic to them to make a few sales or affiliate sales.
- True experts are floating to the top. What are you doing to become one?
- The people that are doing well in my circles of influence are the people who understand that the Internet is becoming a tool of genuine RELATIONSHIPS & INFLUENCE and is becoming less and less of a place for anonymous “quick”, lazy opportunity. With a bit of work, the doors to success are WIDE OPEN, but it’s not a game open to just anyone.
- Selling “physical” products sounds like hard work (which scares off the weak), so there is HUGE opportunity here.
If you are wondering what I tell my kids about the whole “you can do anything” myth, it goes something like this:
“You are meant to serve and do amazing things with the talents, creativity and drive that God has put inside you. Don’t waste it. Keep learning, and always seek solid advice from trusted, accomplished and wise people before leaping. If you think you ‘know enough’ you are still just getting started and lack the humility required for true success.”
It’s the same advice I have for the online entrepreneur that has yet to leave their mark.
What other “reality checks” do you see on the horizon? Leave a comment on any of this – I’d love to read your thoughts.
I think my big one would be, “There’s no such thing as success with no work.” I get so disgusted at the ‘make millions in 10 minutes a day’ trash online. Not to mention, psychology has show that people are miserable if they really have nothing to do. We all need meaningful work.
Another one that has given me pause is the idea that if everyone could follow their passion, society would collapse. We’d have no trash pickup, no ditch diggers, no clean bathrooms in rest stops. Most people can’t, or don’t, follow a passion and so we go on. To be able to truly follow your passion is a major blessing not everyone can have.
What do you think of that last one, Jim?
Blessings!
My thought?
From a biblical vantage point we all have a clear mandate to serve with a higher purpose no matter what work we find ourselves doing. The level of personal fulfillment you receive from your work is of secondary importance compared to the heart attitude you have toward serving. The handful of hours spent doing supposedly “mundane work” doesn’t define us. its our heart attitude that defines us.
In practical terms, teens and first time job seekers should be doing nearly all the “hard jobs” that require low skill levels to help them build a work ethic and lay a foundation for bigger pursuits in the future.
Whatever your hand finds to do, do it like you are doing it for God.
Or if you’re married… do it like it’s for “She Who Must Be Obeyed.” 😉
Thanks for your thoughts! It’s interesting that you say that teens and first time job seekers should do the ‘hard jobs’. Those are the exact demographics many people say have the most freedom to strike out on their own and ‘follow their passion’ – a la the backpacking bloggers in their 20’s that are couch surfing through Europe. 🙂
I agree that all should be done to the glory of God, and that should honestly give passion to anything you do.
Thanks again!
Used your last line with my girls and with myself when I need an attitude adjustment.
That one certainly isn’t a “Jim” original is it?! 😉
I couldn’t agree more, Jim. Both of my kids just graduated from college, have been working since 16 as a hostess, fast food clerk, store associate and sign twirler to name a few of the “hard jobs” and were proud to put it on their resumes. As small business owners ourselves we understand how valuable a work ethic is and a heart attitude even more so. Love your books and been a fan for a long time.
All the best,
Kit
I’m not Jim, but I do have a successful business that started from my passion in a hobby. I can say that no matter how much you may like what your work is (mine is actually centered around guitars, Jim has a small blurb about me in Free Marketing 101 book), there are always going to be things you don’t necessarily like to do. My talent happens to be designing electronic circuits that tons of big name music stars like, and ask me for. We do have an office, and I DO have to clean the toilets, I DO have to sweep the carpets, and I DO have to do alot of envelope licking sometimes…. so I guess my point is that not 100% of any line of work is going to be using your talents necessarily.
Also, it’s worth noting that MANY, MANY people have talents they are capable of cultivating and simply aren’t persistent enough, or don’t have the tenacity to “succeed or die trying”.
Rock on WamplerPedals.com!
Serving others and being real cannot be disputed by anyone at any level. I think accountability is key. Having someone(s) you trust to coach and correct, encourage, guide and temper situations, gives you a peace knowing you’ll be challenged to hang in there.
Treating people with respect takes you leaps and bounds ahead of all the others.
Jim, you teach your children well. Having the freedom to follow our passion is truly a blessing that we can never take for granted and prosper.
God’s hand is in this and is being displayed.
I have always known that the “you can be anything you want to be” was baloney. I’m 5’6″ tall, suppose I wanted to be an NBA All-Pro center – not going to happen. What I have always believed in is what my parents taught me “be the best you can be”. It does not matter what you choose to do – hopefully something you love and are passionate about – but be the best you can be at your chosen life path. Study, practice, find a mentor, do whatever it takes to be the best you can be and I believe you will be successful.
I totally agree that hard work and dedication are keys to success – in combination with the hand of God.. As well, I’m tired of the “make millions in 3 minutes a day without knowing anything hype”. I DO, however, believe that if we all followed our passions there would be people whose passion is to pick up the garbage and do the other so-called mundane work.
Great article. The idea of making “easy” money online has always bothered me – I don’t even WANT that, because like Anna said above, I know I would be miserable if I wasn’t working (although I wouldn’t mind working a little less!). And I don’t believe in getting something for nothing. I actually struggle with the opposite – thinking that it has to be REALLY hard in order for me to be successful, or else I didn’t deserve it. Which may come from having watched my parents work so hard at running their print shop my whole life. Nothing ever came easily for them – and they’re still working hard when they should be retiring. But I love your attitude of whatever you do, making sure you are serving and treating others with respect. Hard to believe people don’t realize that is how we should be acting!
I love the blog post and the last comment Jim 🙂
I feel that if you are going to build a sustainable, long term business, then it takes a massive amount of preparation, research, dedication, belief and, as you say, heart attitude towards serving.
Passion is one thing but acumen is another and the cocktail of skills you build on the road to success is again an important factor I feel…
I’m currently being coached by Lee McIntyre and am definitely at the ‘teen hard job’ stage where I am learning and doing everything I can get the skills for!
I am determined to build a future online though so thanks for the great insite and wise words. I know that it will come in time with perseverance … and not in 10 minutes when I push a button!
P.s, Your ‘List building class’ is an awesome product Jim :o) Great content that I am really glad I purchased.
Cheers
xxxxcarlxxxx
Jim, thank you for saying it like it is. Like everyone else, I admire and respect your total honesty. That’s a great message you give your kids. I’d also like to add another “reality check” to the list. “Experts” are always saying to stay positive, that you attract what you project. While I believe this is generally true, there is a danger in believing this absolutely. Look at all the positive people in history – Christ, Martin Luther King, Jr, etc – and see what happened to them. Like my best friend said, everyone is attracted to positive energy, even those who don’t emanate it.
Incoherent gibberish.
1. There is nothing in common between encouraging kids and reading an online marketing course.
2. The rest of your blog post lacks logic and purpose, to say nothing of any substance.
Your ego is getting the better of you…
Love your honesty. Thanks for the feedback.
Failure to respond doesn’t say much for your honesty.
Polite words couldn’t really express my disappointment and disillusion adequately…
Why are you so angry? What hurt you so badly in your past?
Great Reply Jim. Don’t feed the trolls, I have to keep reminding myself that.
That’s right, Jason. anyone who has a different opinion is automatically a troll.
Well done on your trenchant and original insight; I’m sure it will serve you well…
Mr. Rose:
You are not old enough to make a judgement such as you have. I am at least 30, maybe 40 years your senior. I have experienced 2 business ventures and didn’t make it in either. If the words “you can be anything that you want to be” were true, then I would have been a success. I worked hard, took two jobs to make my venture be successful, but it just wasn’t to be. I made a lot of mistakes, going on my own. I wanted to make those ventures a success with all my heart and might, but God had other plans for me. I went back to teaching, and was very successful there. It was what I had studied for, worked for and was good at. Now I’m retired and plan to live my returement, selling on the internet. One thing I Iearned was that to be successful, it takes more than just want to. It takes advice and teaching from somone who knows and has a real interest in teaching others to be successful. I am new here and sense that Jim is one of those who has that motivation. I am going to learn everything I can from someone who has been there and is successful himself, along with many of his friends. I can’t wait to “get educated” again.
Having owned and operated two separate offline businesses concurrently the last 18 to 20 years – any returns and rewards I have achieved have been in direct proportion to the constant level of value of the services and product I deliver to my customers and tenants.I see no reason any online business would be any different or be governed by any other natural laws?
I have a website (www.gentleshepherd.biz), but haven’t learned how to effectively market it– that’s why I’m looking at your site and info– and I think you are absolutely right that it is easy to get the mistaken idea that building a site is all you need to do, or the most important thing. Yes, it is important to have a site but there is much more that is needed to have traffic, sales, and a following.
Diane Hurst
You can not do whatever you set you mind to do and you can’t be whatever you want to be. But we do have an option that is even better. We can do whatever God wants us to do and be whoever God wants us to be. That usually far exceeds whatever we are able to conjur up on our own!
Well said, Jim thank you. At 45 I learned how to weld and am enjoying success as an art welder. I’m also a writer, successful eBay seller, and the list goes on.
Because someone believed in me, I am confident enough to try new things – things I never would have previously. For me, I believe that it doesn’t matter what we do, God just wants us to be happy. That might sound simple, but the truth is always simple. I love your advice on humility, it’s always helped me to keep learning.
You are one of the VERY few online marketers I listen to, because of your straightforward practices and your sincerely honest advice. It must be the Midwest upbringing in us! (I live up the road from you in Indpls. : )
Good thoughts your way….
I like what you tell your kids. I’m going to post it on my 11 year old daughter’s bedroom door.
I’m honored that you find it so useful. Happy fathers day!
Do for a living what you would do for nothing and you will never work a day in your life.
Jack
I was recently thinking about doing a post like this. When it comes to your plans it very rarely works at first online and needs tweaking
I sure do – check out this interview. Great info on building an ecommerce site:
https://www.jimcockrum.com/blog/2011/05/25/interview-with-a-ecommerce-expert/
Jim,
I’m reading your book, Free Marketing 101 Low and No-Cost Ways to Grow your Business. I appreciate your insights and suggestions. Regarding this article, it’s been a long day so I’ll just say: “Amen.”
Thanks for the feedback Kerry! I’m always up for a good “amen”!
I like this
If you are wondering what I tell my kids about the whole “you can do anything” myth, it goes something like this:
“You are meant to serve and do amazing things with the
talents, creativity and drive that God has put inside you. Don’t waste
it. Keep learning, and always seek solid advice from trusted,
accomplished and wise people before leaping. If you think you ‘know
enough’ you are still just getting started and lack the humility
required for true success.”
However I shared it with a friend. He couldn’t believe that any kid would quite understand what you just typed out here. I then said maybe its older kids which he said this messages is not clear enough for me to understand with using such word as humility. So his questions was are these the exact words you use for your kids and what are their ages and do they understand.
An adult that doesn’t understand what “humility” is? Really?
To answer your question though:
I’ve never read the below phrase word for word to my kids, but I am always training and encouraging them in the lessons it contains. Being willing to learn continually, and admitting that there will always be people that know more than you do is crucial to continued development. Humility is what allows you to think this way.
I’m sorry that ‘serving’ doesn’t sit well with you, but serving always leads to the most meaningful accomplishments. It’s not a position of weakness, but requires the greatest kind of strength.